Category Archives: Faith

All things faith related.

Dear Weary Christian Parent

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Dear Weary Christian Parent,

First of all, the fact that you’re weary shows that you care; that you’re in it for the long haul. So congratulate yourself for loving your children so thoroughly—you’re doing great.

I hope you know you’re not failing just because you got short with your child, forgot that appointment, or yelled when the chaos was too much. You’re human. And when you get real with them and ask your children’s forgiveness, it will likely come with hugs and smiles, just as it does so lavishly from our Father to us.

Don’t forget that you were never meant to “do it all.” Even Jesus had limits and boundaries. He didn’t heal every person in every town he visited. He rested. He sought solace to pray. He didn’t drive himself into the ground trying to be everything for everyone around him; he was human. And he simply kept his focus on where his Father was leading each day. And one more time for those in the back—he rested.

Remember to use your “yes” sparingly and intentionally. Saying yes to something means saying no to other things, be they organic playdates, much-needed family nights, or that alone time with God that you just haven’t managed to squeeze in lately. Whatever you say “yes” or “no” to, pray and think it through. You don’t win any prizes for having your children in the most activities…you only get burned out. Trust me—unless they are future Olympians, your children would much rather have a present, peaceful parent than a shelf full of trophies.

When things feel too hard and you wonder if you’re just crazy (as we all do), remember—parenting IS hard. Culture is against you and your desire to raise godly, moral humans. We are constantly at battle against the evil one who wants to guide our children away from us…away from God. No wonder you’re weary. Christian parenting takes diligence, patience, and lots of grace, and while it’s wonderful and rewarding, it’s also exhausting.

Let Jesus carry you. His strength is unlimited and it’s ours free through the power of the Holy Spirit. Walking in His strength is a pretty incredible privilege in the Christian life. It’s a game-changer.

A few last reminders for battling the weariness. Prioritize sleep as much as possible. Drink more water and less coffee. Laugh more. Carve out at least a few minutes of solitude to sit at the feet of God and lay your day before him, and you won’t regret it. You just might find your weariness being replaced with strength and the peace that surpasses all understanding.

Love,

Jessie

PS—One final thing. Don’t forget that YOU are the parent God decided your child needed. The pairing is purposeful. Move forward with confidence as you guide your child closer to knowing the God of the universe. Also, take a deep breath and calm those racing, worried thoughts. God’s got this. God’s got you.

A Controversial Post … I Guess?

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If you aren’t living under a rock, and I assume you’re not since you’re reading this, you know that on June 24, 2022, the Supreme Court overturned the infamous Roe v Wade ruling from 1973, meaning abortion is no longer deemed an American “right” federally protected by the Constitution. The states now get to decide.

I really, really don’t like to get political online. I like to stay neutral when I can and use social media for connecting with readers, writers, and fellow moms and Jesus-followers. That doesn’t mean I don’t have strong political opinions – ask my close friends and family and you’ll be assured that I do. Sometimes I wade into the choppy online political waters, but I’ve learned that the interwebs aren’t the most productive places to spout opinions and convictions. 😉 However, to be honest, sometimes I don’t want to keep my mouth shut. Especially when it’s an issue of morality.

There is plenty of wiggle room for differences of opinions on many topics in the news these days. But I stand with my pastor, David Wigington, when he recently wrote these words…

“Yesterday’s Supreme Court decision on Roe v. Wade is a victory for unborn children and a victory for life. This ends federal protection for a practice that I believe grieves the heart of God and should grieve the heart of every follower of Jesus. Over 60 million babies have been aborted in my lifetime. Every one of those 60 million babies were known and loved by God. But yesterday’s ruling marks the beginning of the church’s work and not the end. The world needs to see us ACTING with compassion toward the unborn and the born and toward their mothers and fathers… saving these children is about MORE than just ending abortion. I’m also aware I have friends who have lived through horrible nightmares of their own and feel very differently than I do about this issue. Just know that I love you and I see you and I want to hear your story.”

Last night I saw someone being interviewed on the news saying pro-lifers don’t care about what happens to the baby once it’s born. The fact that this is widely believed disgusts me, so let me say loud and clear: YES, we need to protect ALL life, not only the unborn. YES, we need to provide assistance and counseling to pregnant women and do what we can to support them throughout pregnancy, childbirth, and beyond. YES, we need to make sure the child is loved and cared for after birth. YES, we have work to do in many different areas, and YES, there is healing and compassion for those on the other side of abortion. But in formulating our convictions, we have to start with life. None of it matters if life isn’t given a chance.

On June 24th, while I was celebrating a win for human life along with many others, some Christians were angered by the ruling. Pro-choicers chant “My body, my choice!” while pro-lifers respond, “But it’s not your body; it’s a baby’s body, with its own DNA and everything!” So where is the massive disconnect between sides? (And massive, it is!!) The truth is, there is an inherent difference to how we view the very definition of life. Pro-lifers don’t believe the issue has anything to do with women’s health; it’s a matter of a child’s inherent right to live. Pro-choicers don’t believe a fetus is a baby up to a certain point (and that point changes dramatically depending on who you’re talking to), and therefore they make it an issue of women’s healthcare.

According to a 2018 article from SSRN , 45% of Americans believe that the statement human life begins at conception is a philosophical or religious belief, while 95% of biologists believe it’s a fact that human life begins at conception.

Chew on that one for a minute. Keep chewing. Now, leaving God out of it for the sake of conversation with not-yet-Christians, who should we trust to define life? Biologists – whose job it is to study life? Or the American public with all their whims and opinions? I’ll leave that rhetorical.

People on both sides of the issue are extremely fired up right now, and I’m watching long-standing relationships crumble around me before my very eyes between people who can’t see beyond opinions to the person holding them. Whatever side you’re on, if you’re holding tightly to opinions but aren’t able to lay emotions aside and discuss your views using facts while also seeing clearly that the person you’re disagreeing with is a human being made in God’s image , you might want to rethink some things.

I could talk about this all day, but here’s my final thought. If we don’t show love to those we disagree with, the divide will only deepen. America’s temper is rising rapidly and it needs us all to take a deep breath before we speak. Find common ground as a starting point. Don’t shut people down. Remember that most pro-choicers have complex fears and reasons for believing so. While I will never agree with them, I can listen and love them and try to understand, all while praying they come to see life at every age and stage as the miracle it is – a gift worthy of protection from the instant God created it.

Let me leave you with a few verses that spoke to me this morning. I pray they soak into your heart as well.

“Be at peace among yourselves. And we urge you, beloved, to admonish the idlers, encourage the faint hearted, help the weak, be patient with all of them. See than none of you repays evil for evil, but always seek to do good to one another and to all. Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances, for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. Do not quench the Spirit. May the God of peace himself sanctify you entirely; and may your spirit and soul and body be kept sound and blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. The one who calls you is faithful, and he will do this.”  — 1 Thessalonians 5:13b-19, 23-24

What if Our Defintion of “Good” is All Wrong?

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What if our definition of good is all wrong? What if, in our humanness, we reduce goodness to what feels, looks, or seems good when all the while, God has bigger things to say about it?

I have an autoimmune condition. Most of the time I’m fine, but sometimes I’m not. And ten years ago, I had a few of the worst weeks of my life. During those weeks, immediately following the birth of our baby girl, I was unable to carry on normal responsibilities. All I could really do was sit while my husband, family, and friends took care of our newborn, two-year-old, and four-year-old. If I moved my head much at all, my body would spasm, and let me tell you…it was unpleasant. It was bad. Awful. Angering. And all the other adjectives that describe a terrible situation. Physically, it was the worst time of my life.

It may come as a surprise that I can say with full confidence that this time of physical and emotional suffering was the best time of my life, spiritually. When distractions were removed and I found myself crying out to God hundreds of times per day, he and I grew closer, as relationships naturally do when given undivided time and attention.

The book of Isaiah was written seven hundred years before Jesus was born. But this prophet spoke prophecies regarding the coming Savior that unfolded exactly as stated, seven hundred years later. Isaiah 53:10 says this regarding Jesus:

But it was the Lord’s good plan to crush him and cause him grief.

If you’re like me, that sentence gives you pause. We could discuss for days all the approaches to theology regarding God willing or not willing human suffering, but let’s lay that aside for now. The above verse states clearly that God’s plan was to crush Jesus. Crush.

Seem dramatic? I agree. But with this mysterious plan of God’s came the rescue of the entire human race.

And look at 2 Corinthians 1:8b-9. Paul says this in the New Testament:

We were crushed and overwhelmed beyond our ability to endure, and we thought we would never live through it. In fact, we expected to die. But as a result, we stopped relying on ourselves and learned to rely only on God, who raises the dead.

As a result of Paul’s crushing, he learned to rely on God. It may not sound worth it, but I assure you, it is. Paul says so and God says so. Our time on earth is only a blink of an eye compared to eternity in Heaven, so being Heaven-minded now has much greater benefits for us in the long run. We will never fully understand God’s ways, but one truth we can count on is this:

Good things come from crushing.

Maybe we don’t feel it, see it, or even believe it much of the time. But feelings don’t lead us to truth. Truth is truth, regardless of our thoughts or feelings. The truth is, going through intense difficulties refines us in ways that wouldn’t otherwise be possible. As long as we don’t run the other direction, being crushed draws us nearer to God than any amount of church-going, praise songs, or study can. (And no, we don’t draw near to God because God has an ego problem and wants us to need him. We draw near to God so we can know on an intimate level his love, goodness, and guidance.)

This topic was inspired by a recent sermon by my pastor, David Wigington. In his sermon, which you can check out here, he said, “Crushing doesn’t destroy your gifts; it exposes them.” Truer words were never spoken.

When I was going through that health crisis a decade ago, I nearly felt like my life was over. I never dreamed of all God could do with me in the years to come. Suffering allowed me to experience what it means to rely utterly and completely on God, and because of it, I am now able to be and do things I would have otherwise never thought possible.

Suffering is never pleasant in the moment. Of course we want to avoid pain when possible, and I’m not implying otherwise, but when unpreventable suffering does come, if aligning our souls with God himself is what we gain, what could be better? Perhaps it’s time to rethink our perception of good.

Do you have any stories of how God used difficult things in your life to bring about good? I’d love for you to share them in the comments below – it’s so encouraging to read such stories! And if you want to dive deeper into David Wigington’s words of wisdom, check out his awesome book, God of the Long View. Highly recommend!

The Genuine Power of Music

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What song has been stuck in your head lately? For me, it’s the Andy Griffith theme song. My son is into the show lately, and I find myself whistling it without warning.

What song did you dance to during that special moment in your past? I’ll bet you know just the one I’m talking about. I’ll bet you turn it up every time it comes on the radio.

And what song do you turn on extra loud when you need to get your head on straight and get pumped up for your big event? (Let me guess—Eye of the Tiger?)

I’m sure you see my point by now…music is more than something we just turn on in the background occasionally. For most of us, music has genuine power. It has the ability to influence our thoughts, emotions, and even spirit in just an instant.

Did you know music is referenced in the Bible HUNDREDS of times? It’s true. Music is often a big part of a centered, Godly life.

In this day and age, we encounter darkness every direction we turn. Whether it’s in our schools, next door, places of authority, or overseas, there’s no denying that satan is on the move in big new ways. Of course, Ecclesiastes 1:9 reminds us that “there’s nothing new under the sun,” so none of this is a surprise to God, overwhelming though life may seem sometimes. But what are we supposed to do in the face of such darkness?

Thankfully, God has given us effective coping mechanisms while we do our best to live well our time on earth while also craving the spiritual perfection of heaven. Besides spending time with God and others who love God, music is a powerful strategy that can point our eyes toward Jesus while also uplifting our very souls.

Of course, like anything good, humans have found ways to corrupt God’s good gift of music, so being selective in our music choices is key. While clean mainstream music can also be uplifting, when we’re feeling discouraged, fearful, or distant from God, it’s helpful to reach for something a little more substantial.

I don’t know about you, but turning on the local Christian station or finding a good praise CD or playlist can make all the difference in my day.

As a mom to three awesome kids, a goal of mine has been to pour encouraging, Godly music into their lives and brains. Why? Because when hard times come, as they have and will continue to do, those songs will be seared on their very souls.

The Holy Spirit loves to bring to the surface songs that are tucked away in my mind to encourage me in hard times, and I want that for my kids as well. In this way, we can be encouraged by God’s truths even if we’re stuck somewhere without batteries or power, when we’re sitting beside the hospital bed of a loved one, or when we’re falling asleep in the stillness of night.

Memorizing Scripture is a wonderful practice that I highly recommend, but to be honest…I’m not very good at it. Memorizing songs, however, is often effortless. And if I find songs that contain direct verses, even better! Once a song has a place in our brains, it rarely leaves, which is why it’s our job to make sure we consume music that is full of light. It’s our job to encourage our children to consume music that is full of light.

Music becomes a part of us and can even direct the desires of our hearts. Music is a more powerful gift from above than most people give it credit for. So go ahead and flip that radio on if it’s been awhile. Fill your home and your heart with praise and see what a difference it can make.

Lauren Daigle, Bethel Music, and Toby Mac are some of my personal go-tos when I need a musical spiritual boost. Who are some of yours?

Are Your Emotions Telling the Truth?

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“Life was simpler in the good ol’ days.” Sound familiar? Do you agree or disagree?

I’d say it’s true in many ways. People used their brains more than their emotions back then. Self-control, discipline, logic, and truth were king. Nowadays, these virtues are ridiculed more often than they are respected. In a society fueled by emotion, what if we made a point to be different?

Emotions Lie

The current popular mentality sounds something like this: If you feel something, it’s true for you. Follow your feelings. (Even if that means cheating on your spouse and destroying your family … Even if it means severing family relationships for petty reasons and living a lifetime of regret).

When you boil it down, our emotions lie to us, but we often eat these lies up as truth. We think if we feel something, it’s a part of us. It becomes who we are–something we can’t change.

This is a lie.

Emotions are a Blessing

Emotions are God-given, but just like every other good God-given gift (talents, money, sex, etc.), humans easily distort the gift until it becomes bad. This is how we end up holding grudges, dealing with unchecked anger, or letting disappointment dictate our lives. We need to seek God’s help in order to strive for healthy emotional responses (sometimes he may direct us to professional help). With His help, we can train our brains to reign over our emotions.

Emotions aren’t bad; they are beautiful, wonderful things. In fact, God has emotions! But when emotions start leading us instead of the other way around, we walk into some murky waters and usually end up with regrets.

Emotions Need Controlled

My husband recently told me he read that the most successful leaders are those who listen to other perspectives, being willing to change course as they are convinced it is correct. They don’t go into a situation ready to demand their own way. People follow them because they listen as they lead. They’re reasonable. Steady. Is that you? Is that me?

When we hold conversations with others who hold differing views, do emotions rule our words? Do we let our emotions run the show to the point of losing the other person’s trust and respect? If so, that’s a good sign we need to be deliberate in managing our emotions.

A Higher Standard

As I have been writing fiction that takes place in the 1940s, it’s been fun to dive into the research. Things were much more proper and disciplined then because people knew and accepted that it was irresponsible to run your life by emotion.

The world seems to have forgotten these basics. These days, if you don’t run your life by emotion, you’re labelled as stuffy, unaccepting, or old-fashioned. That’s fine by me. Those labels certainly don’t hurt my feelings when I know I’m holding myself to a higher standard.

We need to rise to a higher standard for ourselves and for society. Society is unraveling for lack of morals and structure, in favor of doing whatever feels good. It’s time to flip that narrative on its head. The only way for society to function in good health is for us to function as healthy individuals. If we don’t, we invite worlds of regret and broken relationships, and we miss out on the depth that God and life have to offer.

What God Says

I’m not saying it’s easy to put boundaries on our emotions, nor can I give you easy steps to do so. Heaven knows I haven’t figured it out yet, but I do know lots of prayer and determination are in order.

But what does the Bible say about emotions? A lot. Here are just a few relevant verses:

  • “One who is slow to anger is better than the mighty, and one whose temper is controlled than one who captures a city.”   – Proverbs 16:32
  • “A hot-tempered man stirs up strife, but he who is slow to anger quiets contention.”    – Proverbs 15:18
  • “The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it?” -Jeremiah 17:9
  • “Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility regard others as better than yourselves.”   – Philippians 2:3

As a Christ-follower, I want to look different than the world. While the world around us explodes with fear and anger, what if we refused to join in? What if, instead, we looked to Jesus to be our anchor and source of steadiness? That’s the picture of emotional health I want to strive for.

Let me know in the comments how I can pray for you today! And if you have strategies for keeping your emotions in check, I would love to hear them. Thanks for reading, and have a great week!

Also, if you’re looking for some Christian fiction for yourself or your teen, head over to jessiemattis.com/books to check out my books and download my newest novella, Love on a Whim, for free!