Five Life-Changing Truths I Learned From My Dad

Some people simply make a powerful, lasting difference in the lives of those around them. My dad was one of those people. My dad, Brian Judy, passed away on September 11^th, 2025 after a three-year battle with pancreatic cancer. I wouldn’t wish this painful journey on anyone, but here are five important truths I learned from my incredible dad as I watched him handle his circumstances.

1. Jesus is awesome. For those of us who have been Christ-followers for a while, it’s all too easy to slip into following God out of habit rather than out of the honor he deserves. While my dad had always been a Christian, in his last months he grew closer to Jesus than he’d ever been before, experiencing his salvation and love on a new level. He was in awe of how good God is and in awe of the sacrifice he made through Jesus to allow us eternity with Him. In case any of us have grown complacent in our faith walks, let’s sit on this truth for a minute—Jesus is really and truly awesome.

2. Hope changes everything. Even on his hardest days, my dad held onto hope for healing, which meant his last months, weeks, and days were not spent under the cloud of “dying,” but were filled with optimism, smiles, and plenty of normal conversation. We all held onto hope for his healing, and even though his earthly life ultimately ended, I don’t regret being hopeful. How much more miserable this experience would have been without it! That’s not “living with your head in the clouds” as some might say…it’s walking in faith with the Source of all hope, believing that even if the healing doesn’t come, there is hope for an amazing future—on earth and/or in heaven. A complete game-changer.

3. Manners and human decency matter. Even in his last weeks in the hospital through stage four of one of the most painful types of cancer, my dad would smile, introduce himself and the rest of us to each new doctor, nurse, and tech, ask about their lives and their families, and compliment the hard work they were doing. (Needless to say, this set him apart, and he was often a staff favorite to care for!) In a world where people default to isolation and arguments, trust me—you stick out like a sore thumb when you show genuine interest in others, offering them sincere kindness and respect, no matter your differences, no matter your own personal difficulties and pains. It truly makes your world and their world so much brighter. A warm smile goes a long way, and my dad was king of passing out smiles and making people feel glad to be in his peaceful presence.

4. Complaining is not a given. These days, people complain all the time (not excluding myself). That cashier was rude. Traffic is backed up for miles. I have a headache. I’m tired. What do we hope to accomplish by pulling others into our misery?? What if we just…didn’t? What if we supported the peace of others by refusing to bombard them with our own problems? This is something I’m very much still working on, but let me tell you—it’s possible. I know because I watched my dad walk through a horrendous cancer journey and he legitimately. never. complained.

If anyone had a right to complain, it was him. He didn’t sleep more than an hour at a time for months. He had such pain he literally couldn’t lie down and had to attempt short chunks of sleep sitting in a hard-backed chair. For months, every time he ate, he had painful digestive distress, but of course eating is necessary, so he kept at it, knowing he would feel terrible. I could go on and on. Instead of complaints, my dad spoke words of hope and optimism—constantly. Because he knew, complaining only makes a bad situation worse, for you and everyone around you. He proactively counted his blessings instead of his problems.

5. Prayer works, but God still knows best. God is still moving, even when “the big prayer” doesn’t get answered as we want. Sometimes, in God’s sovereignty, the answer to our prayers is “no,” for reasons we can’t understand. But as we (and hundreds of others) prayed for my dad over the last three years, we saw countless other prayers answered along the way—significant prayers that made this cancer journey much more doable. Prayer still works; I’ve seen it firsthand.

This is just the tip of the iceberg as far as lessons I learned from my dad over the years, but these powerful truths he demonstrated in his hardest days are the ones at the front of my mind. May we all determine in our hearts and minds to take a cue from him and hold tight to Jesus, hope, kindness, gratitude, and prayer. What a beautiful world this would be if we could all embrace these ways of living.

What important life lessons have you learned along your own life’s journey? Please share in the comments so we can all learn and grow together! :)