Tag Archives: exhausted parent

Dear Weary Christian Parent

Faith, Homeschool, Life, , , , , , , , , , ,

Dear Weary Christian Parent,

First of all, the fact that you’re weary shows that you care; that you’re in it for the long haul. So congratulate yourself for loving your children so thoroughly—you’re doing great.

I hope you know you’re not failing just because you got short with your child, forgot that appointment, or yelled when the chaos was too much. You’re human. And when you get real with them and ask your children’s forgiveness, it will likely come with hugs and smiles, just as it does so lavishly from our Father to us.

Don’t forget that you were never meant to “do it all.” Even Jesus had limits and boundaries. He didn’t heal every person in every town he visited. He rested. He sought solace to pray. He didn’t drive himself into the ground trying to be everything for everyone around him; he was human. And he simply kept his focus on where his Father was leading each day. And one more time for those in the back—he rested.

Remember to use your “yes” sparingly and intentionally. Saying yes to something means saying no to other things, be they organic playdates, much-needed family nights, or that alone time with God that you just haven’t managed to squeeze in lately. Whatever you say “yes” or “no” to, pray and think it through. You don’t win any prizes for having your children in the most activities…you only get burned out. Trust me—unless they are future Olympians, your children would much rather have a present, peaceful parent than a shelf full of trophies.

When things feel too hard and you wonder if you’re just crazy (as we all do), remember—parenting IS hard. Culture is against you and your desire to raise godly, moral humans. We are constantly at battle against the evil one who wants to guide our children away from us…away from God. No wonder you’re weary. Christian parenting takes diligence, patience, and lots of grace, and while it’s wonderful and rewarding, it’s also exhausting.

Let Jesus carry you. His strength is unlimited and it’s ours free through the power of the Holy Spirit. Walking in His strength is a pretty incredible privilege in the Christian life. It’s a game-changer.

A few last reminders for battling the weariness. Prioritize sleep as much as possible. Drink more water and less coffee. Laugh more. Carve out at least a few minutes of solitude to sit at the feet of God and lay your day before him, and you won’t regret it. You just might find your weariness being replaced with strength and the peace that surpasses all understanding.

Love,

Jessie

PS—One final thing. Don’t forget that YOU are the parent God decided your child needed. The pairing is purposeful. Move forward with confidence as you guide your child closer to knowing the God of the universe. Also, take a deep breath and calm those racing, worried thoughts. God’s got this. God’s got you.

Parents, Here’s Why I Admire You.

Faith, Life, , , , ,

            I don’t know about you, but I’m greatly inspired by parents at every stage of the parenting life. I have three children of my own (8, 10, and 12), and I learn more every year about the special strength it takes to parent well. Read on to hear just how I admire you, parents!

First of all, to the parents by heart but not by children. You who long for a child to call your own. You shower young relatives with love, and your affection is evident to every young life that intersects with yours. God’s purposes for you are higher than high. Your heart does not go unnoticed. Though I can’t answer why things are as they are, I can assure you that you’re admired for your strength and dignity. Your love and your grit. Though it may feel hidden right now, you are blessed in profound ways that will one day be made clear.

            And dear parents with young ones. You are sleep deprived, learning to sacrifice your own interests, schedule, and desires on behalf of another being. You feel as if you are putting yourself on hold as you navigate all the firsts and tears, yet really you’re growing in leaps and bounds in ways you can’t yet see. You reside in an entirely new world. A world of endless questions and snuggles. Scary, exhausting, wonderfully rewarding, and so full of love. I applaud your determination.

            Parents of grade-schoolers. Your children are transitioning from needing physical protection and attention to needing emotional and intellectual attention. This transition is hard. You appreciate the extra hours of sleep, but hit the pillow hard after answering philosophical bedtime questions. Thanks to world events, you may suddenly have more time in close proximity with your children than you’ve ever had. Maybe you love it. Maybe it’s so hard you wonder if you’re strong enough to keep your cool. But you press on without giving up because you know these are crucial moments in your child’s life. To you I say, well done. You are strong enough. Thank you for loving your children well.

            Parents with teens. For you I have much respect. I’ve yet to raise teens, but I know well and good these are independence-forming years. Everything you tell them is wrong and experience is now their favorite teacher. If only they knew how right you truly are. Someday they will. So today you love them, you do your best, and you shed some tears. You show them grace and pray they honor you with the same. You’ll gradually release your child into the world of cars, friends, and the opposite sex. This might be the stage that frightens me most of all. And yet there’s hope and joy in the midst of new, difficult things. There’s laughter and connection on a new level. Teens need their parents no less than toddlers. Don’t let them pull away too completely. Not just yet. They don’t realize how much they need you. You, parents of teens, are wonders of the power of the human spirit. Keep on doing your best, reminding yourself there’s grace for the times when you’re less than your best, and forgiveness must flow from all sides. And don’t forget to find the joy. Your consistent love in an upside-down world is stabling to your teen.

            Dear parents of grown children. I used to think once kids left the house, life would resume similarly to pre-children days. Oh how laughable I ever dared form that thought. Your heart now lives outside your home; possibly in several states or even countries. Grandchildren come, and the same holds true. The hopes, the worries, the prayers…they only compound. While your house may be neat and quiet, your heart and mind are full to bursting. You may long for the mess and the noise of years past. You’re well aware life could never return to any semblance of pre-child days. You are forever changed, forever balancing new versions of relationships once so straightforward. Keep running the race; your children still need you in wonderful new ways, and old ways alike. Prayers for deep breaths and joy for you.

            A prayer for all parents:

            Lord, thank you for each parent’s heart. You know their struggles and you know their joys. Meet them in the middle of both. Encourage where there’s doubt. Give peace where there’s fear. Give us grace as we seek to do right by the children in our lives. Make us bold and strong, showing us where our children need us to step in and where they need us to step back. Let us never forget that our precious children belong to you. You are their good, good Father. You’ve gifted us with an opportunity to grow in ways we could have never imagined, learning new depths of love, and new depths of leaning on you and your promises. Hold us close as we endeavor to point our children to you. Lighten hearts and let the laughter flow as we seek to do our best and enjoy the ride. We love and praise you, Jesus. Amen.

I’d love to hear from you! Leave me a comment below to let me know what’s on your mind!

One last thing. My novel, Power Up, released last year. Although intended to inspire tweens to embrace the adventure of partnering with the Holy Spirit, over the past year I’ve realized it’s been just as inspiring to adults as the younger crowd. I’ve concluded that many adults (myself included) process simpler messages better than messages that get weighed down with theological jargon and drawn-out sentences. It’s simply more accessible. I encourage you or anyone age 8+ to check out Christian Indie Award-winning Power Up if you’re feeling like your Christian walk has become “hum-drum.” There’s another exciting level that awaits you. Embrace it and refresh your spirit as you see the world through new eyes! (Kindle version only $3.99.)