Tag Archives: meghan e white

Listening to Our Kids is Important -How to Listen Well

Faith, Life, , , , , , ,

I am SO excited to share today’s super relevant words of wisdom by middle grade author Meghan E. White. Meghan is a Christ-follower, homeschooling mom, and a sweet friend. In her novel, Joey Flynn’s Extraordinary Tale, an eleven-year-old boy moves to a new state and encounters all sorts of exciting and unexpected adventures as he learns to trust God. My son absolutely loved this book (sequel, Meghan??), and I’m sure your kids will too. Show her some love by checking it out here and following here online (links at the end). Okay, now on to Meghan’s encouragement for Christian parents, or really anyone with kids in their lives…

Don’t touch that!

Keep your hands to yourself.

Clean your room.

Do your homework

Do your chores.

Brush your teeth.

Wake up.

Go to bed.

Time to go.

Say you’re sorry.

Say thank you.

Do this.

Do that.

Don’t do this.

Don’t do that.

From the time our children are born until they leave our homes, we give them so many directions, orders, and instructions. It’s all part of the parenting gig. These tiny humans are our responsibility. We want functioning, contributing members of society. There’s a lot of pressure on moms and dads.

Christian parents want our children to know Jesus as their Lord and Savior. So we take them to church, and teach them the word, and how to pray, and how to walk out following Jesus. More pressure. Thankfully we are not doing any of this alone. Christians have the Holy Spirit living inside, guiding us, and reminding us of all truth.

In the middle of all the teaching, guiding, and disciplining, it’s imperative to listen to our kids. We are so busy filling them up, which is essential, that we can lose sight of who they are. Our children are individuals. Made in the image of God. They may physically look like us, but they are God’s children first and foremost. It’s really hard to keep that in check.

When my boys were babies I felt so protective of them. God designed that instinct in parents. That’s a good thing. The negative side of that protective feeling is thinking our kids are ours alone. Our children belong to God, and we need to daily hand them back over to Him. I know, I know, not easy to do. When we hand our precious babies and big kids back over to God it frees us up. The load gets lighter. God loves our children more than we do.

Now that we’ve handed our kids over to God, we can be better listeners. Every single person wants to be heard. Our kids are no exception.

Listening to our kids is important.

  • It builds their confidence.

This world would love nothing more than to take our kids, chew them up, and spit them out. Our children’s confidence comes from who they are in Christ. The more they know that what they say matters, the more confident they will be to speak up against evil.

  • It builds our relationship with them.

 Our kids need to know that we are a safe place for them. That we love them no matter what they say or do. If we refuse to listen, or shut them out, they will not open up to us.

  • It builds their relationship with God.

Kids learn how to relate to God as they learn how to relate to us. If they know they can safely come to us with absolutely anything, they will be more likely to come to the perfect Father, God, with anything as well.

How to Listen to our kids.

  • Create a relaxed environment.

Hang out with your kids. If they are little, get on the floor and play with them. If they are teenagers, listen along to the music they like. You have to spend time in their world with the things they enjoy, even if you don’t like the same things.

  • Ask lots of questions.

This is your child’s chance to tell you some things, instead of you telling them. Let them be the expert on whatever the subject is, favorite toy, band, sport, etc. Ask them about what they are really excited about. Listen.

  • Remain calm if they say something shocking.

If you want your kids to feel safe talking to you then you can’t freak out on whatever they tell you. Listen first. If it’s something really controversial like from a teenager, just stay calm before you respond. Be honest. Pray before you speak.

We can’t force our kids to share with us. But we can create a home and family environment where they feel safe sharing.

Father God is safe. He lets us come freely to Him with anything, and everything. We need to show that same unconditional love to our children.

Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry.

James 1:19, NIV

Love you all,

Meghan

Thank you for reading my post!

Followmy bloghttps://meghanewhite.blog

Email me meghanewhiteauthor@gmail.com

Follow me on Twitter: https://twitter/meghan_e_white

Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/meghan_e_white/

Raising Empowered Kids: 3 Practical Tips

Faith, , , , ,

I’m so excited to be featured as a guest blogger this week for Meghan E White! Meghan is a fellow Christ follower, homeschool mom, and middle grade author, and our blogs serve similar purposes–to inspire and encourage others in their walks with God.

If you could use some rejuvenation in your parenting, hop on over to her blog now to find my new post, Raising Empowered Kids! (And while you’re at it, dive in to the rest of her posts and find yourself a bit more motivated and inspired than you were before.)

I’d love to keep in touch! If you haven’t already, sign up with your email and you’ll receive a printable of my top ten favorite verses and quotes! Thanks for reading and have wonderful week! 🙂

Pressing the Reset Button

Faith, Life, , , , , , , , , , ,

I promise not to weigh you down with Coronavirus chatter; that info is already being slammed in our faces from every direction. Let’s take our thoughts in a different direction for a minute. Let’s think about the new face of families in the midst of this pandemic.

Home, At Home, Decoration, Wood, Canvas

 Families are “stuck” at home, schools and lessons cancelled or adapted, many parents either out of work temporarily or working from home. For many, family members are under the same roof for longer than just the gap between dinner and bedtime.

There are currently plenty of excellent posts out there focusing on how to fill the extra time. These posts are helpful and relevant, and will hopefully prevent many parental headaches. But that’s not the intent of this post.

Would you agree with me that social activities are somewhat of an addiction to some families? You know the type—if there’s a gap in their schedule, they aim to fill it. These kids are used to going to school, running from one activity to the next, then waking to do it all over again. That’s a pretty standard family rhythm these days, I’d venture to say.

We used to run our lives similarly. Not because we chose to, necessarily. We just didn’t pause long enough to choose not to. In this day and age, we have to be deliberate to choose not to overfill our schedules; saying “yes” to all. the. things. is a given. During seasons of high busyness, I’ve always known we were missing out on something greater by coloring in all our white space. We’ve since made some good changes, and I haven’t regretted it for a second. Yes, our kids are still in outside activities, and no, as we’ve changed our lifestyle they haven’t missed running around like mad. And no, we’re certainly not perfect at maintaining balance (I wish).

Many families operate in task mode 24/7. I don’t believe relationships have what they need to thrive in task-mode circumstances. There’s peace to be found in life’s white space when it’s no longer filled with rushing.

My prayer for families during this time of “self-distancing” is for families to remember how to function as families again… For free time when kids can remember what it feels like to use their imaginations. For parents to remember how it feels to sit on the couch with a cup of tea and play a game with their kids. No time limits. No, “we have to leave in ten minutes” rushing here and there. No short tempers due to high demand schedules. My prayer is for relationships to rekindle as the breakneck pace of life slows.

Read, Socks, Coffee, Morning, Woman

As easy as it is to complain about restaurants closing, stores being sold out, and isolation being encouraged, let’s be proactive to reverse our thinking. Let’s do all within our power to embrace our situations. Of course there are hard times included with this social isolation, financial difficulties not the least of these. I’m not denying the difficulties here. But look around. Breathe it in. Your home. Your loved ones. The freedoms you still have, which are still abundant.

“Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.” –Philippians 4:7

I don’t believe God is the source of evil and sickness, but I do believe he uses all these things for good. Could it be that God is taking the opportunity to press the “reset” button? Could it be he’s reminding us how central our families truly are to a healthy, functioning society? Let’s not resist what God wants to do in us and with us during this history-making time. Come, Holy Spirit. Bring your Kingdom. Change our hearts. Amen.

I’d love to hear your insights and questions in the comments below! And now, since so many people suddenly have lots of time on their hands, let me recommend a few great books you can find on Amazon…

For tween boys (or girls!), I recommend Joey Flynn’s Extraordinary Tale by Meghan E White. My 9-yr-old son loved it!

For parents of tweens (raising my hand), I highly recommend Hal and Melanie Young’s No Longer Little: Parenting Tweens with Grace and Hope. And I have to be honest–I’m only halfway through this one right now, but I’m hanging on its every word. If you have a tween, please check it out!

For women of all ages, I love Morning Meditations at Marina’s Kitchen Table by Marina Bromley. It’s all you could want and more in a morning devotional.

For cozying up with your little girl, this picture book by Chip Mattis is the sweetest… Under the Dancing Tree.

And if you’re needing something to keep your kids (8 & up) growing in their faith, even if church is unable to meet, I recommend Power Up by Jessie Mattis…yep, that’s me. Shameless plug I know, but still. It’s relevant. 🙂

Thanks for reading and have a blessed, peace-filled week!